"Start living now. Stop Saving the good china for that special occasion... Every day you are alive is a special occasion."-Mary Manin Morrissey
I tried that once- put out the fine china and crystal stemware for a dinner party that included a large number of children. One of the guests wouldn't let her kids use the crystal. She thought I was nuts. I felt really sad for her children.
Too many of us live today, waiting for the next day to be a better one; waiting for special occasions to occur when they are too far and few between. We are in a constant holding pattern of waiting-waiting for something to happen to us-waiting for a better job, waiting to win the lottery, waiting for our relationships to improve, waiting for the economy to get better. How many people are actually taking action; saying yes to what excites them and energizes them; to living life on purpose with gratitude and joy?
Sadly, the majority of people stuck in "holding patterns" waiting their lives away are also prone to the philosophy of "just trying to fit in"- a philosophy which leads only to mind-numbing and limited opportunities. It also leads to stress, lack of sleep, irritability, anger, and boredom. Less than half of American workers are satisfied with their jobs, yet over 80% of workers are not even considering looking for a different job. Imagine spending 8-10 hours a day in a job you don't like, getting paid a wage that doesn't even begin to support your basic needs, fighting through traffic to get there, dealing with angry co-workers, leaving work to go to a second job or deal with all of the responsibilities of family life- carpooling, grocery shopping, getting dinner on the table, paying bills, homework, kids to bed, etc. It doesn't leave much room for gratitude, happiness, or joy- does it?
How do you break the holding pattern?
1) Let go of what drains you- making change can be difficult, especially when you are feeling completely overwhelmed. But, the feeling of being overwhelmed isn't going to go away if you don't make a change. Ask yourself frequently, am I having fun? Does this activity bring me energy? Do my kids enjoy this? Is there anything beneficial to what we are doing? If not, let the activity go. My daughter enjoys playing a variety of sports- she enjoys them with the neighborhood kids. When we signed her up to play in organized leagues, she stopped having fun. She wasn't getting anything out of it and it just resulted in arguments and tears when it came time to get her to the field with her team. It was a no-brainer- time to let it go; to stop worrying about "fitting-in."
2) Put out the fine china- Life should be a celebration. If you spend all of your time waiting for that special occasion to arrive you may find yourself at the end of your life having not celebrated much of anything. How sad that would be. Get out the china and the crystal and make sure that it is not just one more thing that is sitting around collecting dust.
3) Say yes to what excites you- What brings you happiness? What brings a smile to your heart and warms your soul? What energizes you? Pay attention to the things that bring these feelings into your life. Instead of gravitating towards the things that numb you, towards the need to fit in, towards being mediocre- begin looking for ways to fill your life with what brings you peace and joy.
Absolutely no one has been put on this earth to live a life filled with sadness misery.
